Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

In the 1980s a real man didn’t wear red braces and sport a pony tail.  A real man bared his hairy chest and muscular arms, while firing a pair of Uzi machine guns.  A real man stood up for truth, justice and the American way.  That’s why the 1980s belonged to Chuck Norris.

The facts:

  • Chuck Norris doesn’t read books.  He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
  • There is no theory of evolution.  Just a list of creatures that Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
  • Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
  • There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard – just another fist.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch.  HE decides what time it is.
  • Remember the Soviet Union?  They decided to quit once they watched a Delta Force.
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